I didn’t realize yesterday was a trigger exactly. A teacher was absent, and I handed out the mark sheets for her class. I didn’t realize the mark sheets were such a powerful reminder to me. I forgot about it somehow.

Because, of course, I gave mine to Nata, and it was in some ways very much the same. She was looking at something she couldn’t understand—our mark sheets are in English and most of the parents don’t read English—and I had to explain it to her, just as the other teacher with me had to explain. But Nata still had an opinion about it, just as they did yesterday. She still, I think, thought I ought to try harder at certain things. She still was proud of me and she still pushed me to do better.

And I miss her.